True biblical wisdom is more than avoiding mistakes. It is learning to look up to Christ, look honestly within, and look outward to serve others. Proverbs 31 offers a powerful challenge for fathers—and for every follower of Jesus.
A Father’s Lesson I’ll Never Forgot
When I was in high school, a friend and I attempted to replace a faulty thermostat in his car. My dad gave us a few instructions and left us to the task. Hours later, we proudly finished the job.
Then we started the engine.
Coolant sprayed everywhere.
Dad walked over, took one look, and discovered the problem: we had leftover parts.
At that moment, we needed more than enthusiasm. We needed wisdom.
That experience reminds me of a truth that becomes more obvious every year:
“Our Father’s wisdom makes our world stronger.”
Whether we are fathers, mothers, grandparents, teachers, employers, coaches, or friends, God’s wisdom equips us to influence others in life-giving ways.
Why Biblical Wisdom Matters More Than Ever
From the opening pages of Scripture, God calls human beings to reflect His character in the world.
Genesis 1 teaches that men and women are created in God’s image and entrusted with responsibility. We are called to lead, create, steward, serve, and influence others for good.
This means wisdom isn’t reserved for pastors, leaders, or scholars.
Every believer needs it.
Every family benefits from it.
Every community is strengthened by it.
And fathers, in particular, have a sacred opportunity to shape future generations through wise, Christ-centered living.
Proverbs 31 Is Not Just About Women
When most Christians hear “Proverbs 31,” they immediately think about the famous description of the virtuous woman.
But before that celebrated passage, Proverbs 31 begins with a mother’s instruction to her son, King Lemuel.
Her words provide remarkable insight into biblical leadership.
She urges him to pay attention, take his responsibilities seriously, and avoid behaviors that destroy influence.
Her warning is simple:
“Do not spend your strength on women, your vigor on those who ruin kings.” (Proverbs 31:3)
While sexual temptation is certainly in view, the warning reaches further.
The message is clear:
Beware the things that destroy leaders.
Beware the things that destroy influence.
Beware the things that destroy lives.
The Things That Destroy Kings
King Lemuel’s mother warns against foolish choices that cloud judgment and weaken leadership.
The same dangers exist today.
For some, it may be alcohol or substance abuse.
For others, pornography, sexual compromise, greed, pride, anger, or addiction.
Still others may struggle with self-absorption, laziness, or the relentless pursuit of comfort.
These are not merely personal struggles.
They affect marriages.
They affect children.
They affect churches.
They affect communities.
What destroys a leader rarely harms only the leader.
“What destroys a leader rarely harms only the leader.”
The Surprising Goal of Wisdom
Many people assume Christianity is primarily about avoiding bad behavior.
But Proverbs points toward something much greater.
The goal isn’t merely to stop doing destructive things.
The goal is to become the kind of person God can use to bless others.
Notice where King Lemuel’s mother directs his attention:
“Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves.”
“Defend the rights of the poor and needy.”
Biblical wisdom always moves beyond self-preservation toward loving service.
God’s wisdom produces justice, compassion, and courageous action on behalf of others.
How to Grow in Wisdom: Look Up, Look In, Look Out
One simple framework emerges from both Proverbs and the New Testament:
1. Look Up: Fix Your Eyes on Jesus
If we are honest, none of us possesses enough wisdom on our own.
Fatherhood exposes that reality.
Leadership exposes it.
Life exposes it.
That’s why Scripture consistently points us to Christ.
Luke 2:40 tells us that Jesus “grew and became strong; he was filled with wisdom.”
Paul declares that in Christ are hidden “all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge” (Col. 2:3).
If we want wisdom, we must begin with Jesus.
He is not merely our example.
He is our source.
“The wisdom we need is not something we manufacture; it is something we receive from Christ.”
2. Look In: Examine What Is Filling Your Life
In Ephesians 5, the Apostle Paul writes:
“Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise.”
He then contrasts drunkenness with being filled with the Spirit.
That contrast raises an important question:
What is filling you?
What occupies your mind?
What shapes your desires?
What drives your decisions?
Many people attempt to satisfy their deepest longings through pleasure, success, achievement, entertainment, or unhealthy habits.
Yet none of those things can provide lasting fulfillment.
God calls us to be filled with His Spirit, His Word, gratitude, worship, and prayer.
Wise living begins with an honest inventory of the heart.
3. Look Out: Use Your Influence to Serve Others
Jesus never lived a self-focused life.
Neither should His followers.
Every day presents opportunities to make a difference:
- Encouraging someone who feels forgotten
- Supporting struggling families
- Mentoring younger believers
- Caring for vulnerable neighbors
- Sharing the hope of the gospel
- Standing up for those who cannot stand up for themselves
The wisest people are rarely the most self-promoting.
They are the most others-focused.
Biblical wisdom transforms influence into service.
A Personal Father’s Day Reflection
A few years ago, my son Joel found a journal he had written as a child.
On the first page he had penned these words:
“Dear God, I love my dad. I love him because he’s kind. Even when he’s stern or cross, I love him.”
Naturally, I asked him:
“Were you trying to talk yourself into loving me?”
We both laughed.
But his words also reminded me of something deeper.
Like every father, I can look back and see moments where I wish I had been wiser.
I suspect most parents feel the same way.
The good news is that our hope is not found in perfect performance.
Our hope is found in a perfect Savior.
Jesus never fails.
His wisdom never runs dry.
His grace remains sufficient.
A Father’s Day Challenge for Every Believer
Whether you’re a father, mother, grandparent, young adult, or student, God’s invitation is the same:
Look up to Christ.
Look honestly within.
Look outward toward others.
Don’t settle for a self-indulgent life.
Don’t waste your influence.
Live wisely.
Love courageously.
Serve faithfully.
Speak up for those who need a voice.
And trust that as God’s wisdom shapes your life, He will use you to strengthen the lives of others.
Because our Father’s wisdom truly does make our world stronger.
johneltonpletcher 